STARING:
(in order of appearance) Me, James (bus) - lead, Paul A - band, Paul M, Doug, Thom Yorke (unlikely)

INTERLUDE:
I'm at this massive gig with Paul and Doug with about 50,000 other lost souls [something vague - Thom Yorke's body - wanting of?!]

INTERVAL:
I get up to get food during the interval its a make your own burgers. As a consumer whore of my own design I head to a MaccyDees franchise to make a McChicken in a bagette [something terribly off the wall and continental]. I ask an elderly man where longer bagettes [obviously the bigger the tastier] are.

MENTAL BREAKDOWN:
Turns out they are in draw as Matt F fat stewards don't pay go back to seat where Doug and Paul are waiting and some annoying woman follows me grabs a banana [I have two - getting worryingly sexual] and throws it behind her and it lands by lead's foot gig stops [something vague about bungee jumping brides] RIOT RIOT RIOT against band [were they swedish?] so I escort the band away to my house down Valley Road to Bury Lane before we get to the top two women fans [dog in tow - probably yappie little thing] see us. Have to leg it back to go up the alley [apologises to those not familiar with 'the village'] Paul A just sits down on the kerb at the bottom.

ESCAPE:
Me and James leg it up Paul is with Thom [sure its him now], Doug and Paul A. James hides in shed I take out [what does that mean?!] two seventeen year olds and go to my house where Dad's car keys and in the garden I'm suddenly naked what the fuck is going on?!

GUITAR MEN DON'T HAVE A CLUE